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13.2.2011

已经好久没有写Blog了。

今天, 我与14 位 Band Members 一起 去 Bukit Tinggi JJ outing。

想起昨早,我是多么辛苦才可以不放他们的飞机。 本来是应该要到我那严肃的大伯家拜年。 大昨晚一只反复的想,要该怎么办。放飞机? 还是别去大伯家。如果没去,父母可能会遭到斥骂,我就更惨了。 去的话,又没人在意我的存在。父母总是爱讲话,与其他亲戚朋友讲话。 我不是在看电视, 就是拿电脑去上Facebook。 多么无聊。每一年,就是这样。直到一定的时间,LokeHan 来了我才与他聊个不想回家这样。他多么好聊啊。 超级好的大哥哥。 超级关心人的。有时也很笨,一直酸我。不过有他在真的就不一样。想了一整晚,都没有答案。

直到昨早,8 点起身洗鞋子, 洗完了就看戏,然后发呆,还在想着该怎么办才好。到爸爸起身了, 我才进房间。 我不敢面对我父母。 昨晚,父母不停的唠叨,他们不停地说:“No matter what happens, family are the ones who support and never leaves you. Friends one day will leave you. No matter wad , family first. " 好烦。 我知道。 我没想过要离开,只是想出去而已。况且,这可能是最后一次看到他,未来我就不知道了。另一个目的,我想要 Band ,由 Outing 开始挑战团结的力量。总觉得,我们的心都散了。想抓回他们的心, 才搞Outing的。 没告诉你们吧=D

那时,我已决定要去大伯家,想放弃了, 突然间,妈妈告诉我:“你看你爸几疼你,他让你去。” 当时的我吓呆了。第一个表情不是开心。又犹豫了。如果我去,父母该怎么告诉他们?让我面对没关系,我不想让他们又说没教女儿之类的 Palia 话。 爸爸,骑他的Scooter载我去。 一路上,我不敢开口。到了BBT, 下Motor后我抬头看着他的表情。他,应该为我想得好多, 变得憔悴了。

爸.. 对不起.. 谢谢你... 我是笑着对他说, 可是他却:“Go la Go la." 我一转身,泪流下来了。



到那边,他们决定唱歌。我便进去了。我看到全部人都差不多到齐了,很开心。可是唱着唱着,有些人便走出去了。一开始就没事。可是一去就不回头。干吗?出去不会讲声吗?叫食物了, 打电话叫他们回来都没有回来。忧闷的唱歌。唱歌时他们不停地尖叫,玩耍, 很开心地看着他们这样开心的玩耍。有些的玩Game, 某人有IPad的玩IPad。唱歌的唱歌。 一些人一直Skip歌, 越唱越没意思,越唱越不开心,超级无聊。什么嘛。18++ 块花爽的吗?也许每个人喜欢的歌不一样,我能了解,有些人,唱歌不是他们的兴趣。我也是。可能是我叫错对象了吧。下次请你们喜欢做什么可以说吗?别爽爽花那些父母辛苦赚的钱。我没心情了,就想出去叫他们回来。
送来的食物凉了。我放下Mic就出去等他们回来。打了几通都没回来。回来时好像很潇洒。问去哪里就别傻笑而已嘛。回答嘛。这就算了。我可以忍让。


然后,有些人还是唱歌,有些人还是打Game, 有些人就开始吃。我只喝汽水。一直想到底为什么会这样。看着他们的一举一动,一直把Mic推掉的动作,又想着大伯的反应,想着父母,想着那些“水” 刚刚的一举一动,想着我是多么的辛苦挣扎到BBT。 我不禁哭了。冲忙到厕所发泄。哪知被Kumiko发现了。把事情一五一十地告诉他。她说得对,3 个不同的Gang要一时在一起,是很难的事。不过,至少我成功地做了第一步。咳, 算了吧,就当作一个教训吧。回到房,还是忍不住想哭,还是没变的他们, 我只好静静吃我的东西吧。HAH. 超笨的。 一直哭.. 想哭着笑都难。
算了, 唱歌后就各走各的。我与Kumiko Jyin WeiYong Chengguan Hinson 走来走去。还是一样无聊。 笑都没力了 。 直到那些“大的”决定一起下KP。 说到这真是气死人。大的不等人(什么3个走先,什么他会搭),小的超慢(有必要这样慢吗?)=.= 只有笨的等来等去(说真的,我超笨)。 大家真的都很不客气。=.=

下KP又来各走各的。我不想讲他们要去哪里了。

到了5点多,我与父母在kP 楼下逛, 喝喝下午茶, 吃Papa Roti。当时我才发现我从早上到6点多没吃。然后到Bukit Raja Jusco 逛Shopping mall。 一家人吃晚餐。 吃后我便去一个Barbeque Party, 到晚上9.30 才到家。




希望下一次会进步吧。不想说是谁是谁。希望他们都为对方想一下,好想大家出来是很开心的,出来一起玩,一起去哪里哪里.. 一起做一样的事。



发泄完毕。

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